Thursday, December 5, 2013

The Definition of a True Submissive

What truly defines a submissive?

I spend time with a lot of people who enjoy being in their submissive mind space, and it seems to bring up a lot of questions.  Especially in our society there is a lot of discomfort and shakiness around the need to submit, and those of you who enjoy submission.

In My personal opinion the definition of a submissive is:
A person who enjoys the feelings of relinquishing control.

Most submissives find a combination of thrill or excitement with letting go, and a sort of relief, calming or relaxation from their submission.  Some may find it very easy to let go, some may take a little while.

The myth that all submissives are alpha in real life is simply not true.  Life calls for every one of us to be submissive or alpha at various times. Many of us are in a very submissive mode at the DMV or with a police officer at a traffic stop for instance. Many of us can be very alpha in certain business meetings and then very submissive in other ones.... there is a spectrum here.  Various needs and goals are facilitated by taking on a submissive or alpha role and I don't see any problem with that.  I do agree that some people who spend a great deal of time on one side of this spectrum enjoy time on the other side for a balance. However, a lot of people who are submissive a great deal of time in daily life also enjoy consensual D/s submission because of the consent, eroticism, knowing they are pleasing someone, or just plain kinkiness. As thoughtful and emotional beings we often play with the things that hold the most capacity to hurt us, to develop "callouses", comfort, and safety around those things.

There doesn't really NEED to be a deep seated need in the brain or life of a person to dictate an enjoyment of BDSM. For some of us that is how it works, but not all.  SOME PEOPLE JUST ENJOY A BREAK.  A break from who they are supposed to be, a break from thinking about this and that, a break from the minutia of daily life.  As a sweet little boy wrote lately to Me,
 "Why, when I'm under pressure, or a little depressed, why do I always feel better after a session? Logically it doesn't make much sense to me, but emotionally I guess it does."
Submission is not defined by PAIN.  Painsluts are fabulous and bring a great deal of joy to My life, however you don't need to like pain to be submissive.  Pain, bondage, sissification, protocols, worshipping My feet, and so on are all just TOOLS to help achieve and reinforce that submissive mind state.  One is not more effective than the other, and different tools work for different people.

This brings Me back to lack of control, and why scripted sessions don't work.  Part of what My submissives rely on Me for is to make up sessions for them.  They simply arrive and submit. I have a detailed application of course to help Me learn what tools tend to work best to help them submit, but the choices for what happens and how are Mine.  This is extremely important. Sometimes I will even put a submissive through something they don't enjoy because I enjoy it... you will learn to enjoy and want MY fetishes.  This only reinforces the high of the lack of control you can feel.  In the process of doing the thing I want you to do, a wave of powerlessness, the emptying of YOUR life, YOUR day, YOUR wishes happens.  WE (that's YOU AND ME) are shutting off your conscious mind and letting Me run your mind and body.

24/7 submission to Me is not so much a different ball game as a longer amount of time spent in that submissive mind state.  Just as with exercising, meditation or any other practice the more time spent can create a deepening, ease, discovery of different levels of submission and so on. Of course this requires a longer amount of time with Me in the controlling and dominant position, so this is something I don't take lightly or enter into without a great deal of chemistry and discussion of goals.  I look at 24/7 submission as a way for Me as a Goddess to mold, shape and enrich the entire life of My submissive. I may also require some dark evil things for My own lust and prurient interests, but largely I am a sweet, caring Mistress to My 24/7 slaves. I am truly dominant and pretty self centered however, so I am not sweet and caring because the submissive wants that, but because being that sort of Goddess makes Me happy and adds to My life.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

A Story of Love for Electro Torture

As something of a natural sadist and top growing up I innocently found the fun of ropes, chains, blades, and whips quite early on.  The joys of Electric Torture were to come to Me later... and never leave!

My first electro toy didn't seem to work for Me. I had a tiny regular therapy style TENS unit given to Me by My Leather mentor one afternoon while I had a particular submissive painslut tied up firmly in a body bag, hooded- fully restrained.  This TENS didn't really do much at all and was quite a let down.
Being both a sadist and idealist, I knew there was better out there but it would be awhile before I would see.

When I started furnishing My own dungeon I decided to start buying some electro torture toys to see what I liked best.  As with whips or anything else, I really prefer a toy that can straddle the whole spectrum between sensual pleasure and insane, mind boggling pain.   Dialing up between the two sides of the spectrum is really probably also a dialing up of My sadistic pleasure.  Of course, sometimes to a very masochistic submissive, never dialing up is even more mean.

I got the Zeus 6 channel powerbox first as it seemed to offer the most possibilities for attachments for a somewhat decent price. I MUST warn, when I received this box it did NOT have a very good how to manual.  Luckily however I have a lot of friends that enjoy helping Me "test" out My terrible toys, so I just used this an occasion to throw an electro torture party.  There was truly a lot of "Oh, I don't feel anything yet."  followed by the "WOW! Oh, do that again!"  and soon we had figured a lot out about the device. The particular woman I was testing this on was someone who can take and enjoy a bit of torture so I knew I had a toy that suited My taste.  I now have more attachments for this thing than I can keep organized... clips, clamps, insertable plugs, penis bands, and MY absolute favorite- the gloves!

The gloves are a specifically wonderful toy for the creative sadist because they go very easily and quickly from sweet and nice to terrible and unbelievably sadistic just from how I apply My hands, or where I apply them.  Obviously the fact they are a natural extension of My body also helps.  The gloves also allow Me to hold metal and charge it, which can be very fun with all kinds of metal toys and insertables... and means any toy I touch that is conductive can become a vehicle for more electro torture...

I have wasted money on many inferior electro torture toys. One I was particularly enjoying continuously broke, I have now bought the stupid thing several times and won't buy it again. Either these are poorly made or I just put them through too much (which I am willing to admit is possible.)  If the toys can't take the heat though, they don't belong in My kitchen! I'm speaking about the electrogasm by Zeus.

WHY I LOVED this electro toy: It had a remote control.  I am a sucker for remote control. It allows for so much humiliation, public control and fun games.  Hence why I bought it again and again. It also had the ability to make a man feel like he was being penetrated anally with no internal... the currents would course through his muscles, he would often be completely confused about what was happening to him, and in the end there was nothing penetrating him at all. Obviously this could be really useful and fun for anal training and play, or people afraid or not ready to be penetrated to experience the sensation. Of course I can do this with other toys, but this was a tiny remote device. I have two broken ones in a drawer if anyone wants to fiddle with the wiring, along with stacks of new pads for them.


There is less lead time for the submissive to know what
is about to happen.  There is less sound, motion or other clues for the submissive to know how much it is about to hurt.  The sadist or dom in charge MUST be in tune with their submissive, as they can mostly only see by reaction how much pain they are truly in.  It can also be extremely pleasurable, surprisingly so for some of My submissives. I have seen more than one time a submissive forced to orgasm quite quickly and easily with just the electric current.... although I can't help thinking those tight restraints helped them just a little too!

AND then I discovered the Violet WAND!  But I suppose I will write on that later on.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Sissy Slut Soap Training

I had a lovely afternoon training a poor little sissy who has been trying to see Me for years. Finally in My care, this sissy was beyond nervous!  I love when a submissive has only been in My presence for 10 minutes and already has sweat beading up on their forehead!
First training focused on the basics, positions, My preferred attire for My sissy, and helping the sissy get into the right headspace to truly be subservient, slutty and cute.

A quick operation in the medical room and we had replaced the gross hairy A-cup man boobs with some lovely, pendulous silicone tits!  A nice full bust really makes the waist look nice and trim.  Add a steel corset and anyone can have a wonderful barbie-doll body!
Check out those realistic nipples!

I have to say I was in a particularly sadistic and impatient mood today, so it seemed the only way to teach this sissy to correct her manners was a nice big bar of soap in her mouth.  Do sissies have dirty mouths?  Well, not anymore.
Regardless of My somewhat severe ministrations, sissy seems to be very grateful for her training... most grateful however that I didn't make her wear a cage for Me for the rest of the week.