Wednesday, April 30, 2014
The Ordeal Path
Bondage can hurt, and bondage can be comfortable enough to sleep in.
Flogging can hurt, and flogging can be comforting and reassuring, almost like a massage.
Some people are not interested in the hurt that I can offer, and that is ok. The hurt can be something you enjoy like a masochist does (painsluts can't get enough at times!) and this is just plain fun for both the painsluts and the sadistic bitch who gets to enjoy them. Or the hurt can be part of what I like to call an ordeal.
ordeal (n.) Old English ordel, ordal, "trial by physical test," literally "judgment, verdict," from Proto-Germanic noun *uz-dailjam (cognates: Old Saxon urdeli, Old Frisian urdel, Dutch oordeel, German urteil "judgment"), literally "that which is dealt out" (by the gods), from *uzdailijan "share out," related to Old English adælan "to deal out" (see deal (n.1)). Curiously absent in Middle English, and perhaps reborrowed 16c. from Medieval Latin or Middle French, which got it from Germanic. The notion is of the kind of arduous physical test (such as walking blindfolded and barefoot between red-hot plowshares) that was believed to determine a person's guilt or innocence by immediate judgment of the deity, an ancient Teutonic mode of trial. English retains a more exact sense of the word; its cognates in German, etc., have been generalized. Metaphoric extension to "anything which tests character or endurance" is attested from 1650s. The prefix or- survives in English only in this word, and originally was an adverb and preposition meaning "out."
The "ordeal" is something you have probably heard of (remember that old movie, a Man called horse? I can't believe they showed us that torture in school!). I find it most clearly outlined in the book Sacred Kink, by Lee Harrington. The ordeal path calls us to bring something to the table. The ordeal pushes us to an extreme and we can come back better. As I said in My twitter this week, Sometimes a slave needs to be broken down and rebuilt better.
Sometimes a Domina can be so skilled that we know what you need even when you don't. This week one of My slaves really needed a good spanking from Me, and she didn't know she needed it. No matter, it is part of who I am that allowed Me to see she needed that, and even if she didn't know, it was administered.
Some people don't like any of the hurt at all. They enjoy powerlessness and relinquishing control to whatever I want to do that day, however I choose to enjoy them. Within this enjoyment however is another ordeal of its own... it is scary to give up your control. I have had people safeword with Me many times not out of physical pain, but out of sheer terror, i.e. psychological pain.
Play can be fun, and the deeper fun and effects of playing on these levels can affect everything in your life.
I am not advocating moving past your limits or a lack of safety.
I am advocating moving to your edges, pushing yourself to climb mountains, seeing what happens when you let go.
And a special note, I do understand something about sexual attraction must make a man want to see a one dimensional view. I am not one dimensional, and because I am dominant you are stuck with that reality! HA! In short, DON'T PIGEONHOLE ME. While I'm at it, don't pigeonhole any Domina, please.
I like this, I like that, I change My mind, I do what I want.
I'm lucky because for the most part I don't care what you are into: I just like dealing it out!